Manage the Conflicts in Your Life.
Cultivate Satisfying Relationships.
Discover the Power of Choice.
You can choose to change your life — and enhance the energy, vitality, and intimacy of your relationships. Take the first step and reach out to me today.
Serving clients in Texas, Louisiana, and Colorado
You don’t have to keep “winging it” when it comes to dealing with your relationship problems. You can learn how to manage the obstacles and challenges in your life. I can help you learn how to do this with effective techniques and on-demand service options.
“I reached out to Doug because I was feeling lost. My career was unsatisfying, my marriage was struggling, and I didn’t have a strong sense of self. I knew I wanted to be happy and have satisfying relationships but I didn’t know how.”
Ready to Unpack What Doesn’t Work in Your Relationships?
When it comes to relationships with your partner, family, coworkers, and friends - conflicts are inevitable. Oftentimes, these conflicts can cling to us, drag us down, and relentlessly linger.
Finding a solution or relief can be temporary — I mention this often because your relationship problems are possibly woven deeper than you realize.
Addressing these relationship issues adequately can minimize what you never want to resurface. Unresolved conflicts can cause enormous strain on you — and your relationship can crumble under the weight of it all.
If it doesn’t, you might be in a worse position. One where you feel like you can’t agree with the people in your life due to polar opposite viewpoints, such as:
Your wife wants to spend Christmas with her family every year, but you hate your in-laws.
Your husband wants to know about every penny you spend, but you don't want to ask for permission to buy things.
Your brother refuses to accept responsibility for his drinking problem, but you hear him blaming everyone else for his behavior.
Your parents won’t accept the fact that they’re aging and need help, but you think they need to make changes to how they live.
When your relationship begins to melt down, it often feels like all you’re dealing with is constant chaos. Even worse, you might be feeling lonely, isolated, contemptuous, or resentful toward the people you value most.
Have you ever considered or processed the fact that other people don’t want you to control them? Do you realize no one is asking you to give your opinions and/or perspectives about their lives and choices? Stop offering what is not wanted!
To address your relationship conflicts, it’s crucial that you learn how to make better choices for yourself first. Working with me will hopefully allow you to discover the energy and vitality you have always wanted your relationships to have.
Are you ready to cultivate satisfying relationships?
Today's relationships are too busy, too stressed, too involved in child-rearing, and simply too tired for intimacy. And if all this isn't enough, add in the psychotropic medications many of us take to alleviate the stress that continues to build. How did it get to this point? Because very few of us received formal education that teaches us how to negotiate conflicts in our life.
But you can stop trying to figure things out on your own by getting out of your head — and out of your own way. You can work with a qualified therapist instead. One who helps you learn how to manage the conflicts in your relationships — and starts working with you immediately.
Discover How to Cultivate
In more than a decade of helping clients, I’ve discovered that everyone manages chaos and drama differently. But even if the problems can’t be solved, the topics can be managed.
So regardless of the obstacles in your life and relationships, you can choose to overcome what’s making you uncomfortable. Consider these two alternatives when you think about the problems in your relationships:
Your problems are not problems at all — but are topics to manage. This most often occurs with “problems” that don’t have realistic or reasonable solutions like when you despair over the fact that you’re aging and can’t stop the flow of time.
Your problems might actually be polarities — or “ongoing, chronic issues that are unavoidable and unsolvable.”¹ This most often occurs with problems that appear to have two extreme or opposing solutions like trying to live a fulfilling life by balancing work and home commitments.
These two notions are founded on the underlying belief that the only person’s behavior you can control is your own. But it’s essential that you choose curiosity over complacency and open your mind to new ways of thinking.
When you work with me, you’ll learn how to master these concepts - shift your mindset, harness the power of choice, and enhance your quality of life.
Working with me is about learning a more formal approach to living and loving life. I’ll help equip you with the tools and skills to make better choices. With this knowledge, you’ll be able to nurture the relationships that you cherish and value.
Although it may not feel like it right now, I’m confident you have the ability to start building satisfying relationships — and I can help you start now.
“Doug helped me prioritize important topics in my life and gain perspective on what’s a ‘crisis’ versus a ‘topic to manage.’ I now have an understanding of myself that I didn’t have before. I have a vision for who I am and who I am striving to be. I am much happier and at ease than I was when I first began working with Doug nine months ago. I’ve had the strength to take on the important topics in my life, which I wasn’t able to do before.”
What Makes Satisfying Relationships Unique
There is a sad truth about modern romance: it seldom pays attention to "values clarification" until a "values crisis" occurs. In other words, people don't usually focus on what they want or need in their relationships until a crisis arises.
There is a tendency for clashing couples to concentrate only on the surface of their issues (i.e. money, sex, politics, etc.). However, if you listen closely to what’s really being said in a heated conversation, you'll realize they’re discussing topics like respect, recognition, control, trust, and expectations.
During these moments, it’s crucial to step back from the content of the argument and examine the source of your discomfort. When you shine a light on your thoughts, you can reflect on what you want and how you feel.
Together, I can help you develop this skill. My goal is to identify techniques and psychological tools that will enable you to:
Clarify what you desire in your relationships.
Identify learned patterns of behavior that may (or may not) be the source of your tensions.
Find ways to prioritize common ground, curiosity, and compassion.
Listen for the underlying fears others are trying to communicate to you.
Share your own distress with your partner, family, and friends.
It’s my goal to help you manage the topics in your life and relationships by offering effective therapy with on-demand service options. Think about therapy with me as experiencing more joy, vitality, and the comfort you desire in your relationships.
Truly satisfying relationships are built through action, not discussion.
Ready to get started?
“Doug is a straight shooter, who doesn’t sugarcoat the therapy sessions. He’s results-oriented and professional. I'm grateful to have finally found a therapist that I enjoy working with who provides advice that’s actually helpful.”
Relationship Therapy When
You Really Need It
When it comes to relationship conflicts, there's no age limit or point in time when roadblocks disappear. Whether you’ve been together for 50 days or 50 years, I can help you address the reality of your reality.
In my practice, I work with adults and couples of all backgrounds that are seeking more performance in their life - the old behavior just doesn't work anymore. So you might say “I’m seeing it all” — and nothing you say will surprise me.
I’ve helped people experiencing the same relational despair you’re going through right now. I understand that you’re longing for satisfying relationships in your life, but you’re faced with issues like:
Entrenched patterns you just can't seem to change.
Loneliness in the presence of your loved ones.
Lack of sex or physical intimacy.
Choosing to isolate yourself from those you love, need, and value.
Nonstop battling with others over sex, money, religion, social issues, etc.
In theory, these issues seem straightforward. But in reality, it can feel like an internal, dramatic event is disrupting your entire world.
Does the tension in your relationships lead to arguments that easily spiral out of control? In the aftermath of the outburst, you may not want to be alone and you find yourself being comforted by the person you just fought with — even though you’re not really liking them at the moment.
This confusing riot of emotions is common. But making sense of this dynamic is difficult — and you don’t have to unravel it all on your own.
Over the years, I’ve helped countless individuals and couples in this same situation. With my help, they chose to:
Rise above the relentless quarrels and gridlock in their relationships.
Find ways to compromise with the people in their life.
Move toward repairing their dreams, goals, and desires.
Foster satisfying relationships filled with respect, joy, love, and vitality.
And now, I’m ready to do the same for you.
“I chose Doug specifically because of his expertise in sexual/relational intimacy and financial literacy. What I didn’t realize was that his expertise is rooted in the power of ‘choice,’ which determines how one approaches all aspects of life — not just intimacy and finances.”
My Philosophy, Approach, and Style
As a therapist, I believe in the power of choice and the desire to level up. I also believe you can overcome the obstacles that you will encounter in your life and relationships.
In our sessions together, I aim to help you focus your determination, commitment, and mindset toward your goals. I also use many core techniques to help you cultivate satisfying relationships, such as:
Choice Theory — the idea that you can take responsibility for your life and happiness by simply understanding that there are good choices, better choices, and ultimately the best choices to be made.
Polarity Management — understanding that both you and the people in your life can be correct in a disagreement, even though you each identify two opposing answers for the same topic.
Gottman Method — an approach that focuses on repairing what’s ruptured in your relationships, identifying antidotes for criticism or defensive feelings, and understanding how to compromise in a gridlocked situation.
I utilize these and other techniques to help you gain a new perspective on your relationship conflicts. Then, we brainstorm logical solutions to overcome these relationship hurdles.
I’ve helped a multitude of people build fulfilling relationships that fostered deeper connections with their partners, family, coworkers, and friends. They learned how to rekindle their curiosity, compassion, and spontaneity while simultaneously improving their communication skills.
If you’re ready to improve your relationships, I’d love to talk further. Because you can cultivate satisfying relationships in your life once you understand how to make better choices.